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What in the...?!??!
The Iditarod is a famous long-distance
race held in Alaska. (They even made a movie about it). In the race, an idiot
gets all bundled up in his warmest clothes and has a pack of dogs pull him on a
sled over 1,100 miles while he stares at the last dog's ass.
The Idiotarod is quite similar, except you don't have to stare at a dog's
ass! Well, there are a few other differences too. There aren't any dogs
involved, you don't have a sled, and it's not in Alaska!
Replace the sled with a shopping cart, replace the dog team with 4 people,
and replace the 1,100 miles of Alaskan countryside with the streets of
Downtown Phoenix.
It all started in San Francisco about 10 years ago with what they dubbed the
"Urban Iditarod". In 2004, New York City got a hold of it and made it
ridiculous. You can check out the original
San Francisco Idiotarod or feel free
to Google
search on that action.
Yeah?
Phoenix has a lot of cool creative people living here, and many of them are right
downtown. A group of us decided that Phoenix needs to start doing more fun
stuff. The Idiotarod is the first in several events being planned for our fair
city.
What else?
"The Three P's"
PARTY! Well, a KICK-ASS after-party of course! A portion of the entry
fees will go to
buy a keg or two of decent beer, booze, cups, ice, etc. Every participant gets a
free invite to the party!
PRIZES! The First place team is a bunch of idiots that COMPLETELY MISSED THE
POINT OF THE RACE. There will be NO PRIZE FOR FIRST OR SECOND PLACE. The first prize
will be awarded to third place. Prizes will also be given to best team costumes.
There may be additional prizes announced along the way too!
PHOSPHORUS! Well, we won't really be giving you any phosphorus, but it's
such a fun word, and gets dissed by the other P words and the F words too. F
those P words!
Sold!
So you want to do this eh? Just follow these three simple
steps!
Step 1: Recruit a 5-person team.
Step 2: Register your team. (Registration is $6 per person
$30/team)
Step 3: Get a cart and show up with it and your team on Race
Day!
FAQ
- Who can race?
- Anyone who is at least 21 years of age. Unfortunately, the
checkpoints are at bars, so if you're under 21 you might have problems
getting past the checkpoints. Last year we had 50 runners. If we can get
double that to 20 teams I'll be impressed. Feel free to forward this
invitation to anyone you know!
- Isn't it going to be cold?
- Only until you start "mushing"! The race goes off rain or shine,
blizzard or breeze. Bundle up.
- What's the route?
- That's up to you. The race begins in Phoenix. We will announce a few
checkpoints and a finish line on race day. You choose the fastest path.
You will be held for 20 minutes at each checkpoint. There will be booze
at the checkpoints.
- Can you tell me how long it will be?
- I sure can!
- Well how long will it be?
- Oh! It will be approximately 3 miles. Since you choose your own
routes, it could be a lot longer though!
- What time do we show up?
- On Race Day, you should show up about an hour early. Get there by
noon, because the race starts promptly at 1pm. By 3pm, you should be done
with the race and celebrating.
- Can we get drunk?
- It makes the pain go away. Just sober up before you drive your
car/truck/van.
- Are there rules?
- Yes, so many that they have their own page!
- Does my team need its own shopping cart?
- Yes.
- Where do we get a cart?
- Drive around until you see one.
- Are you suggesting we steal it?
- No. Find one that isn't at the supermarket and bring it back to them.
On the way, enter this race with it.
- Can we modify our shopping cart?
- Yes, although there are rules -- kind of like stock car racing. Your
shopping cart must roll on four rubber caster wheels (no air filled
tires). As a general rule, you can attach things to your cart, make a
riding platform, and grease up your wheels. You can also chop up the cart
and rearrange the pieces -- but they all have to be accounted for. And
because teams have asked in the past, no, your shopping cart can not be
motorized.
- What do I do with my cart after the race?
- Take it back to the store where it belongs. The cart misses its
home. Oh, and the cart's friends and loved ones too.
- What is this going to cost me?
- Dignity. Plus, there is a $6 per person entry fee. ($30/team)
- Can I make a side bet?
- Absolutely.
- I want to race but my friends are lame. Is there a team I can
join?
- Maybe. Join the email
list, and you can ask around for help.
- Is there a way that I can participate without racing?
- Absolutely! We're going to need race marshalls and other people to
help organize this a bit. Email us from the registration page!
-
- We would much rather you race. We think you'll have more fun. But
yeah, you can come cheer on the teams at the starting line or at any
of the checkpoints. And, fine, bring your camera.
- Can my team wear matching outfits?
- I think you should! There will be a prize for Best in Show.
- Why are you doing this?
- Because it's important to fight cold and kill boredom. What else are
you doing that weekend?
- But seriously?
- Yeah. We want to live in a city where people do ridiculous
things to amuse others -- and themselves. And because we believe the
most important thing you can do with public space is use it.
- Where did you get the idea for this event?
- We stole it from a group of people who recently did it in Seattle.
I think they stole it from a group of people in NYC. They stole it from a
group of people in San Francisco who have been doing it for 10 years.
There are also people doing the same thing in other cities, like Ann
Arbor, Michigan for one. The Idiotarod debuted in New York in 2004. People
loved it. There are a lot of stories and photographs about the event at
their website: www.precisionaccidents.com.
- Who won last year?
- Check the wikipedia page for
prior results.
- Where can I get more information?
- Use the links at the top of each page on this site! Or email us from
the registration page.
- Where can I learn more about the real Iditarod?
- This is a good website: www.iditarod.com
- Will there be an afterparty?
- Yes. An undisclosed site will host the official award show
and afterparty. There will be music, DJs, dancing, and libations. It's
going to be great. Register now! Your
pre-registration monies will directly fund this event!
- How do I sign up for the race?
- At the Registration page.
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